There Are Better Ways to Live: Finding Your Dream Life When Life Gets in the Way

How a weekend challenge led to life-changing insights about living authentically and pursuing your dreams

I stared out the window of our South Jordan home, watching the summer heat shimmer off the pavement. My husband was already twenty hours into what I considered his latest exercise in extremes—a 100-hour fast combined with swimming 10 miles at VASA Fitness. The very thought made my stomach clench—not from hunger, but from worry and frustration.

When Life Forces You to Choose Better Ways to Live

"This is insane," I muttered to the empty house, the silence amplifying my irritation. Outside, it was one of those perfect Utah summer days—warm but not scorching, ideal for spending time on the beautiful golf courses that make our state so special. But instead of enjoying our precious weekend together, I was home alone while he pushed himself through another extreme challenge at the gym.

Here I was, spending our weekend apart instead of on the fairways I'd been dreaming about all week.

Finding Joy in Unexpected Places: A Lesson in Living Fully

I'd lost my father just weeks earlier. The grief was still fresh, still catching me off guard at unexpected moments. Maybe that's why this weekend felt so important, why the thought of wasting it on another one of my husband's physical challenges felt particularly painful. Time suddenly seemed more precious, more fragile.

So I made a different choice. I called my mom.

"Want to go to Las Hacienda?" I asked her. "Just us girls?"

The restaurant was warm and bustling, filled with the kind of comfortable noise that makes you forget your troubles for a while. As my mom and I shared stories over dinner, I realized something beautiful was happening. In my husband's absence, I wasn't just killing time—I was creating a different kind of memory, one that honored both my father's recent passing and my mother's presence in my life.

The Life-Changing Quote That Changed Everything

When I went to check on him at the 50-hour mark, driving to the gym with a mix of concern and lingering frustration, I found him looking gaunt and exhausted.  The worry that had been simmering all weekend finally boiled over.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" I asked, unable to keep the concern from my voice. "I think this might kill you."

He looked up at me, water still dripping from his hair. "There are worse ways to die," he said with that stubborn smile I'd married.

The words tumbled out of my mouth before I could stop them: "There are better ways to live."

 He paused, something shifting in his expression.

"You're right," he said slowly. "That's a great quote. You need to use that from now on."

When Quitting Would Have Meant Another Lost Weekend

But the real test came 24 hours before his planned completion. My phone rang—it was him, and I could hear the defeat in his voice before he even spoke.

"I think I need to stop," he said, his words slower than usual. "I don't think I can make it the full 100 hours."

My heart sank, but not just from worry about his health. I knew exactly what this meant: if he quit now, there would be another weekend—maybe next month, maybe in a few months—where he'd attempt this challenge again—another weekend stolen from us, another date night sacrificed to his need to prove something to himself.

"No," I said firmly, surprising myself with the strength in my voice. "You've come too far to quit now. You have 24 hours left. You can do this."

"But I'm so tired, and I—"

"Listen to me," I interrupted. "If you quit now, we both know you'll try this again. And that means another weekend I'll spend alone while you're at the gym instead of with me. You're going to finish this, and then we're going to find better ways to challenge ourselves—together."

Something in my tone must have reached him because I heard his breathing change. "You're right," he said quietly. "I'll finish it."

How to Identify Your Better Ways to Live: 5 Life-Changing Questions

There are better ways to live.

Those six words have been echoing in my mind ever since. They've made me ask myself the hard questions I'd been avoiding—questions that might transform how you think about your own life:

1. What Are Your Better Ways to Live?

When was the last time I truly prioritized joy over obligation, experience over expectation? That golf course I'd been dreaming about—why was it just a dream? Why did I wait for someone else's schedule to align with my desires?

2. What's Holding You Back from Your Dreams?

I think about the house I sometimes imagine—maybe something with more character, in a neighborhood where I could walk to delis and bookstores. I think about the trips I've been "planning" for years, the hobbies I've been meaning to pick up "when I have time."

3. Do You Live Where You Want to Live?

Living in Utah means I'm surrounded by incredible natural beauty, yet how often do I take the time to experience it? How many times have I driven past those mountain trails in summer thinking, "Someday I'll hike that"? How many perfect golf days have I let slip by?

4. Are You Living Your Dream Lifestyle?

5. What Would You Do If You Knew Life Was Short?

Living Your Best Life: The Cake, The Dance, The Dream

Life is short. Losing my father made that truth impossible to ignore. Our best years can slip away while we're busy preparing to live, rather than living our best life.

So here's what I'm learning about authentic living: Eat the cake—not just because it's someone's birthday, but because it's Tuesday and the cake looks amazing. Dance the dance, even if you're not sure you know the steps. Buy the dress that makes you feel beautiful, not the practical one that will "go with everything."

Date the one who makes your heart skip, even if the timing isn't perfect. Buy the house that feels like home, not just the one that makes financial sense on paper. Live the dream that's been whispering to you in quiet moments, not the one that looks good on your resume.

How I'm Learning to Live My Dream Life

I'm still figuring out what my better ways to live look like, but I'm starting to pay attention to the moments when I feel most alive:

When I'm walking a golf course at sunset, the stress of the week melts away with each swing. When I'm sharing a meal with someone I love, I put away my phone and listen to their stories. When I'm exploring a new neighborhood, I discover hidden gems I never knew existed.

These aren't grand gestures or extreme challenges. They're simple choices to prioritize presence over productivity, connection over achievement, and joy over obligation.

Your Invitation to Start Living Authentically Today

My husband finished his challenge, by the way. All 100 hours, all 10 miles. I'm proud of him, but I'm also grateful for the lesson his extreme taught me about living life to the fullest.

Because while he was pushing his physical limits, I discovered something about my emotional and spiritual ones. I learned that sometimes the most radical thing you can do isn't to fast for 100 hours—it's to feast on the life that's right in front of you.

So I'm asking you the same question I'm asking myself: What are your better ways to live? What's holding you back from the lifestyle you want, not just the one you think you should want?

The golf course is still there. The restaurants are open. The dreams are waiting.

There are better ways to live—and life is too short to keep postponing them.

What's your "better way to live"? Share your dreams and what's holding you back in the comments below. Sometimes the first step to living authentically is simply naming what we want.